Funny couple story

Johnny wanted to have sex with a girl in his office, but she belonged to someone else...

One day, Johnny got so frustrated that he went up to her and said, "I'll give you a $100 if you let me screw you. But the girl said NO.

Johnny said, "I'll be fast. I'll throw the money on the floor, you bend down, and I'll be finished by the time you pick it up. "

She thought for a moment and said that she would have to consult her boyfriend... So she called her boyfriend and told him the story.

Her boyfriend says, "Ask him for $200, pick up the money very fast, he won't even be able to get his pants down."

So she agrees and accepts the proposal. Half an hour goes by, and the boyfriend is waiting for his girlfriend to call.

Finally, after 45 minutes, the girlfriend calls back and he asks her what happened.

She responded, "The bastard used coins!"

Before And After Marriage

John -Ahh..At last. I can hardly wait!

Jane -Do you want me to leave?

John -NO! Don't even think about it!
Jane -Do you love me?
John -Ofcourse! Always have and always will!
Jane -Have you ever cheated on me?
John -NO! Why are you even asking?
Jane -Will you kiss me?
John -With every chance I get!
Jane -Will you hit me?
John -Hell no! Are you crazy?
Jane -Can I trust you?
John -Yes
Jane -Darling!

*For the after marriage part you all read from the bottom all the way back to the top*

Just a quick laugh

Teacher: History is a very interesting subject. It tells you about what had happened in the past.
Student: Please teacher, I don't think I want to study history.
Teacher: Why?
Student: There is no future in it..

Teacher: Ted, if your father has $10 and you ask him for $6, how much would your father still have?
Ted: $10.
Teacher: You really don't know maths.
Ted:You don't know my father!!!

Man: How old is your father?
Boy: As old as me
Man: How can that be?
Boy: He became a father only when I was born

Teacher: Simon, your composition on "My Dog" is exactly the same as your brother's. Did u copy his?
Simon: No, teacher, it's the same dog!!

Teacher: "Where were u born?"
Student: "Singapore, Sir."
Teacher: "Which part?"
Student: "All of me, Sir."

Teacher: "How come you do not comb your hair?"
Ah Koi: "No comb, Sir."
Teacher: "Use your dad's then."
Ah Koi: "No hair, Sir."

Well, that's the end of the jokes. Hope you had a good laugh! hehehe..Have a nice day!

Liverpool's Gerrard denies assault charge

England and Liverpool midfielder Steven Gerrard told a court on Friday he would plead not guilty to assaulting a man in a bar brawl in December.

The Liverpool captain was arrested in the early hours of December 29 after police were called to the Lounge Bar nightclub in Southport, north of Liverpool in northwest England.

Company director Marcus McGee, 34, required hospital treatment after receiving facial injuries in the incident.

Liverpool manager Rafael Benitez said the club were fully behind Gerrard who was released on bail to appear in court again on March 20, the day before a Premier League game against title rivals Aston Villa.

"I was watching him play five-a-side today and he scored two or three very good goals, so that's very positive. He is OK," Benitez told the club's website. "He has our full support, he knows this."

In a short hearing at North Sefton magistrates court, Gerrard, 28, said he intended to deny charges of assault occasioning bodily harm and affray, the Press Association reported.

Two other men, John Doran, 29, and Ian Smith, 19, both from Liverpool are also charged with the same offences.

The incident occurred following Gerrard's man-of-the-match performance in a 5-1 win over Newcastle United in which he had scored twice.

Cleopatra Stratan

So cute..Since Meme likes this video so much,I posted this for you sweety =)

Benitez denies pressure is getting to Liverpool

Liverpool boss Rafael Benitez insisted that his side are not wilting under the pressure of a title fight, despite their failure to beat neighbours Everton at Anfield on Monday night.

Gerrard drives home his 67th min goal.
The Reds had looked on course to collect the three points that would have moved them above Manchester United and back to the Premier League summit after Steven Gerrard's 35-yard drive after 68 minutes.
But a late equaliser from Tim Cahill, who headed home unmarked at the near post from a Mikel Arteta free-kick, meant Benitez's side remain behind their north-west rivals on goal difference having also played a game extra.

Despite that the Liverpool boss still maintained: ''The players believe they can challenge for the title.''

He added: ''You are not suffering from pressure after leading until three minutes from time."

''It is not pressure to be level on points with Manchester United in January."

''We are disappointed with how we defended against that late free-kick, and disappointed with giving a free-kick away at that stage so close to our box. It could have been avoided.''

Yossi Benayoun had needlessly conceded that free-kick for a foul on Victor Anichebe.

''I will have to look at that incident again, but we had talked about not conceding free-kicks in that sort of area because Everton's set-plays are good,'' Benitez added.

''But we are still level with United and we know we can play better.
''We will improve as we get more of our injured players back, we still believe we can challenge for the title.''

Everton boss David Moyes believed that his side deserved their goal and the hard-earned point.
It extended Everton's unbeaten run to seven games and Moyes said: ''We showed what we have been doing now for a few weeks. We played with confidence and a draw was certainly a fair result."

''Maybe we could have had a penalty just before they scored, that was disappointing.

''We were still appealing for the penalty when Liverpool broke away and we allowed Steven Gerrard to walk into midfield and score.
''We turned off at that moment. We lost our concentration after not getting the penalty, and Liverpool took advantage.''
Moyes refused to condemn referee Howard Webb for the decision not to award a spot-kick for Martin Skrtel's push on Anichebe.

Moyes said: ''The referee had a very good game. There was a couple of penalty shouts at each end he didn't give them. I am more concerned with how we turned off at the moment we were denied a possible penalty rather than with the referee's decision.''

But Moyes hailed his players for their spirited performance.

''Liverpool have been buying players to win titles, we are not in that league,'' he said.

''But we have showed the stability there is at our club, and how far we have come in the last few years.
''We were able to give Liverpool a really good game on their own pitch and we deserved the point, we earned it.''

Gadong Area Flooded!!

Man, should the goverment do something about this or not?

Pictures below shows us inside mall at around 11 ++ pm. Memanat lahh..sementara nada be orang dlm mall ahh..haha